This elastic beard will make you beautiful

by Phil Edwards · @PhilEdwardsInc· June 26, 2014

Want to get rid of that double chin? Try an elastic beard.

This 1942 patent shows that people have tried to fix sagging faces the easy way for decades. Inventor Ray Kalbach used his background in fabric manufacturing to create this bizarre device. It functions pretty much as you’d imagine—you strap this on, hope it sticks when you remove the fabric, and then repeat (because something tells us it didn’t work very well).